DOG-GONNIT!!

Once again, I have been blessed with the unexpected arrival of a Dawg. Kind of like waking up after a long night only to discover you've been locked up.

Too many times our lovely home has been the haven for Doggie Dumpers. In one instance, seven puppies dropped at our gate on a very cold New Year's Day morning. Found homes for all of them. Happily ever after.

Yesterday, at the shank of my evening, I'm in my pajamas and bathrobe and my loving husband inquires,"Where'd you get that new Dawg?". "What new Dawg?", I replied. He said, "The one sleeping out there in front of the tack room".

UH-OH.

A cute little Dawg, white with little brown spots and sporting a blue collar with a tag. So, I went out to see what I could do. My dear husband helped entice the Dawg into a crate by use of a hot-dog. Okay, now I have sticker-burrs in my bathrobe. Unpleasant.

As responsible animal owner, I did the right thing. I contacted the Vet and asked if she could run the tag ID# to see if the Dawg had been lost. She complied, even though it was a Sunday, (one of the perks of being Mayor, I guess).

When the Vet called back, she reported that this Dawg was a black Chihuahua and the purported owner's phone had been disconnected. Unless the Dawg has been sharing performance enhancing drugs with Roger Clemens and a bleaching booth with Michael Jackson, he's definitely wearing stolen plates and is not a Chihuahua. Another case of Doggie-Dumping.

Being fairly well full-up here, I enlisted the help and assistance of a neighbor; the proprietor of a beautiful Estate, complete with an available kennel. Perfect...at least for overnight until I could make arrangements for the Dawg.

My husband reminded me this morning that the Dawg matched the description of a "dream Dawg" a sweet friend of mine has been pining for and in need of since the demise of her loving pet.

I contacted the spouse of my sweet friend, a powerful man of substantial prominence. He seemed interested. I then contacted the Heroic Estate owner to give him the news of a possible ideal placement for the Dawg.

When I rang the estate owner and inquired about the Dawg, there was a pregnant pause. "What's wrong?", I asked. He replied, "I've LOST THE DOG"! She jumped the fence and was gone. Now, this esteemed gentleman has a robust and colorful past when it comes to Dawgs, and several times I have been dispatched to help him find his LOST DOGS who have "jumped the fence(s)". I asked, "What happened?, I thought you were going to put the Dawg in your kennel overnight!!".

He replied, "No I didn't want to put the Dawg in the kennel because she would "defile" it and aggravate MY Dawg".

The good news is the Dawg was found and hopefully on the way home to a nice place where it is not apt to defile, at least not to another Dawg.

A most noted resident remarked to me that because of the economy, this really is becoming a big problem, this Doggie Dumping, and while cat-napping is in decline, doggie dumping seems to be on the "up-tick".

As Mayor, I intend to bring this issue before City Council and recommend that we need a "Bone-a-Fido" Dawgcatcher and heavy fines for the dumpers.

Oh, wait, right...we don't have a City Council, we don't really even have a Mayor, not to mention a Dawg catcher. Maybe this is all just going to my head.

But think about it folks...we're standing up for chickens, we should stand up for the four-legged ones as well.

Okay, gotta go..its a sticker-burr thing.

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Regards,
Da Mayor